


tell me how it was when we were younger

by villainness



Category: She-Ra and the Princesses of Power (2018)
Genre: Catra (She-Ra) Needs a Hug, Childhood Memories, F/F, Fluff, Fluff and Humor, Making Out, Nightmares, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-27
Updated: 2020-05-27
Packaged: 2021-03-02 17:56:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,527
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24410944
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/villainness/pseuds/villainness
Summary: It used to be so easy, back when they were kids, before the trauma and the mishaps and the misunderstandings. Easy to understand each other, to follow the pulse of that magnetic force that seemed to draw them towards each other time after time.Things have changed, but the connection is still there- albeit a little different. Adora wishes they could go back to feeling that ease, and in a night of longing and passion, their walls break down long enough to feel it.
Relationships: Adora & Catra (She-Ra), Adora/Catra (She-Ra)
Comments: 2
Kudos: 164





	tell me how it was when we were younger

**Author's Note:**

> not really a songfic, but the title is based off a lyric from younger by the hails!

They had always felt that spark between them, that special connection that made them put each other first, to seek each other's gaze in a crowd. There was this seemingly magnetic pulse between them, a force that made them constantly wish to be at each other’s side to feel the harmony of when they just ‘clicked’. Their energy seemed to match each other, but it wasn’t stagnant energy. Being together fueled them, it clouded their vision in vibrant colors and filled them with the feeling of being alive.

The past three years had rattled that connection. It hadn’t severed it- no, every time Adora had seen Catra, the desire to grab her hand and run away with her all the way back to Bright Moon had filled her core. But she knew, at the time, that wasn’t possible. The only way Catra would have come with her was as a prisoner, as a war criminal. And Catra wouldn’t have come willingly. She wouldn’t have taken her hand, stared into her eyes as Adora so dearly wished. She would’ve kicked, scratched, and lashed her way out of Adora’s hold and stage yet another one of her devious plans to get away. They had been enemies, and after trying so many times, Adora had nearly given up on imagining a future where they weren’t.

But they were on the same side now. They were on the same side _again_. There was no reason to fight, and they had forgiven each other for how they had acted in the war. In the end, Catra had realized her mistakes and even owned up to them. She wasn’t perfect, but Adora could see the small ways she tried to change herself. She saw it when Catra closed her eyes and took a step back instead of rising to the challenge. She saw it when she reluctantly accepted Glimmer and Bow’s help, usually about adjusting to life outside of the Horde. Catra was learning to accept the love shown her way, to not see people’s simple acts of kindness as favors waiting to be cashed in.

When they were alone, that spark was still there, and Adora wanted to explore it to its fullest extent. She wanted to see where that fire inside her would take them, to see how long their spark would crackle with electricity and what they could to make that feeling grow till it consumed them. But she felt the sense that it wasn’t quite the same anymore. There was a sense of discord that interrupted their connection, especially when past resentments were brought up or something reminded them a little too much of their past mistakes towards each other. 

She had fallen asleep with these thoughts running through her head as Catra lay beside her in her Bright Moon bed. Catra was fast asleep in the crook of her elbow, her short locks of hair tickling Adora’s skin and breath hitting her neck as she snoozed. Adora lay facing her, studying her features in the dark night. Behind her, the moon shined through the tall glass window, giving her a soft glow behind her pointed ears and sharp jawline. It seemed to round out her rough edges, and give her that special kind of softness Catra only ever let Adora see. She let that idea lull her to sleep, the idea that despite the dramatic changes in their relationship, only she got to see this private, special side of Catra, reserved only for her. They still shared this unique connection to each other, one that no other in either's lives could match.

They had laid like this before, back in the Horde. Only by accident. She wasn’t even sure if Catra knew they had fallen asleep like this. Usually, it was when they had stayed up too late, talking and joking about the other cadets, making silly background stories for the older Force Captains, or just talking about what they wished for in their future. They always spoke in low voices- not because they cared if anyone around them woke up, but because they felt as if these midnight conversations were exclusively for the two of them. They didn’t want anyone else intruding. During the day, it was the two of them against everyone else in the Fright Zone. But at night, they could exist in a world where it was just the two of them, at peace.

She had seen a younger version of Catra like this, sleeping against her in the bunks. It was darker there, and her back was lit with the ominous glow of the green emergency lights dotting the barrack floors instead of the silvery moonlight. She remembered how vulnerable she looked, and how deeply Adora wanted to protect her. She would watch Catra sleep with her eyebrows scrunched together, a tight frown on her lips. She could only imagine what type of nightmares went on inside her head. Catra had always gotten the worse side of Shadow Weaver’s abuse, and she knew it was something almost always playing in the back of her mind. Adora would watch her tail curl and twitch and listen to the quiet whimpers the young girl made. Adora would reach out to stroke behind her drooped ears, till her expression softened and the girl finally fell into a dreamless sleep. Only then, would she close her own eyes and rest for the few hours left before the early morning roll calls. 

Tonight, she awoke again to one of Catra’s late night fits. Catra didn’t move much in her sleep, it was Adora who had the tendency to thrash and flail around, accidentally kicking Catra off the mattress. But when Catra had nightmares, her tail would thump up and down in a restless anxiety. It was a softer noise in the castle, as her tail thumped against fluffed bed sheets rather than the cool metal of the barrack bunks. But it was something she always caught, something her unconscious mind still seemed to listen for when she was asleep after so many years of hearing it.

Adora yawned and stretched her free hand out till her tired eyes fluttered open, meeting Catra’s closed ones. She still lay against her arm, which seemed to be a little numb from her weight. Though she was in the same spot, Catra seemed to have curled tighter during the night to almost a fetal position. Her tail was wrapped around her, quietly rapping against the blankets. Even though she couldn’t see her eyes, she could feel the fear radiating off her body. Her shoulders were tense, her eyes clenched tightly in her sleep, and she bit her bottom lip so hard Adora was worried she would soon break the surface of her dry, cracked lips.

Adora pushed herself up on her shoulder, making sure not to jostle Catra’s sleeping form, but enough that she could reach over and give her a better look. From this angle, she could see Catra’s hands clutched against her chest. Her claws were outstretched- something in the dream must’ve threatened her- digging into the side of her chest, not deep enough to break skin, but enough that it would leave her fur mangled and scratched by morning. Adora imagined she dreamt of Prime, Shadow Weaver’s death having closed that chapter in their life with a little more finality. It was something that would always affect her, but Catra seemed to be thinking of her more recent traumas more often than the ones from her past. 

She stretched her hand out and placed it behind Catra’s ear, illuminated by the moon and starlight, just like she would as a child. Catra seemed to tense, however. Her ears stiffened and her fur seemed to stand up, on edge. Adora changed tactics, trying something new. Slowly, she slid her hand down Catra’s short brown tufts, over her curled inward neck, stopping at the curves between her shoulder blades. There, she used her calloused hand to gently stroke her, her fingers finding the knots between her muscles and slowly easing the tightness out of them. It took a while, but eventually, Catra’s breathing steadied. Her ears dropped down lazily, and she stretched her spine back out as the tension was finally released.

Content, Adora readied herself to pull away and catch that last couple hours of sleep. But before she could turn away, she caught the light reflecting in Catra’s barely open slits of blue and yellow eyes.

“Adora?” she mumbled, exhaustion apparent in her voice. The short massage may have relaxed her, but the stress and tiredness had yet to leave her. Catra rubbed at her eyes, waking herself up.

“Hey, Catra.” She smiled. It felt nice, flipping Catra’s signature phrase for her own use. She didn’t move her hand from her back, but paused her stroking motion, unsure if she would want her to continue. It was there again, that little break in their connection. Even when she was sure, now, that Catra loved her, and that Catra knew she loved her back, she still felt that small cause for concern. There was something blocking her from fully following her desires to hold Catra and never let her go, to give her every inch of her body and soul. She knew it would be a slow process, of Catra opening herself back up to her, and Adora worried she would go too fast and scare the girl off. 

“Mm,” Catra whined. She wasn’t fully awake, and probably didn’t have much of a filter on her, much to Adora's pleasure. “Stay. Feels… nice.” She seemed to push herself back, towards the hand Adora had around her.

So Adora let her hand stay where it was. She stroked up and down against her shoulder blades, watching the rise and fall of Catra’s chest, the two of them staring at each other, eye to eye, but silent. She felt that magnetism between them. As they held each other’s gaze, they seemed to be exchanging silent words, trading energies that fueled each other into looking deeper into each other's eyes. She didn’t even notice her body leaning downward towards Catra’s face, till she noticed Catra close her eyes and let her bottom lip fall, inviting her to kiss her. 

She did, pushing her lips against hers in one swift motion. Both of their lips were chapped, but with their mouths together, they seemed to soften. She felt the push and pull of the electricity between them, encouraging Adora to slide her hand from Catra’s shoulders and into her hair, cradling her head and holding the soft curls between her rough fingers. She lifted Catra’s head off the arm she lay on, nudging her so Catra followed when she rolled them over so Catra lay over her hips. She lightly pushed Catra’s head downwards to deepen their kiss and threw her numb arm back over Catra’s waist, holding her in place.

They were both awake now. She was sure Catra felt that spark too. She didn’t have to say anything, but Catra seemed to know she wanted- what their bodies wanted. To be pressed up against each other, clinging desperately, searching each other for new sensations. Catra’s hands were above Adora’s head, entangled with the blond strands messily strewn about the pillow. She grabbed fistfuls of her hair as she moved her lips against Adora’s, as if doing so would bring them closer, make them share every bit of their being. 

Finally, Catra pulled away, panting. Her fingers loosened the grip on Adora’s hair, but she left them in place, enjoying the feeling of her hair against her hands. The two met each other’s eyes, blushing as they realized their position and how quickly their intense passion had built. 

“Careful, you’ll wake Lonnie,” Adora joked, breaking the silence with her laugh and bringing them back to their memories of when their rough housing got a little too rowdy, on the nights they really did wake their fellow cadets. It usually ended in Lonnie throwing her pillow at them to make them shut up, and Adora returning to her bunk just long enough that the young cadet would fall back asleep so she could continue her talk with Catra.

“Oh, shut up.” Adora watched as Catra rolled her eyes, then softened. She seemed to be thinking, trying to decide whether she should say something. Or do something. She seemed to decide yes, on whatever it was. Catra lowered her face till it was against Adora’s cheek. Her whole body seemed to relax and melt against Adora’s form. Catra wrapped her legs around Adora’s thighs, causing Adora to whine.

“You’re crushing me, you brat!” She wrapped her hands around her back once more, lightly tickling her fur. Catra laughed, squirming slightly, but didn’t pull away. As Adora’s tickled shifted back into soft petting, Catra let out a relaxed purr, letting her body meld further with Adora’s. They were nose to nose, looking at each other with all of their affections, walls down from sleepiness and their brief moment of passion.

“I wanted to do that for a long time, Catra.” Adora finally spoke. The admission made her face warm, but she knew the sentiment was shared. 

“Back in the Horde, you mean? When we were teens?” Adora knew Catra had to know the answer was yes, but she humored her anyway. Sometimes, she seemed to need that verbal confirmation, reminding her and solidifying the idea of Adora’s love for her.

“Yeah, duh. I used to watch you sleep and stare at your lips.”

“You’re such a creep!” Catra laughed, her sharp teeth softly grazing Adora’s cheek as her mouth opened and let out that sound melodious to Adora’s ears.

“What! No!” Adora pushed her up, but not off her. Catra landed back down seconds later, their lips bouncing off each other yet again. 

“I used to watch you when you had nightmares,” Adora whispered against them. “Like tonight. And all I wanted was to make them go away. And, you know, get a kiss back for doing so.” 

Catra obliged, giving her a quick but deep kiss. They paused, breathing in and out in rhythm, holding each other. Adora didn’t press her about her dreams. She didn’t need to know all the details- Catra would tell her when she was ready, but for now, all that mattered was their trust in each other. Their love for each other.

"Thank you, Adora. For tonight. And all the nights." She pressed her forehead against her, closing her eyes. Together, they lay silently, till the sounds of the quiet Etherian night lulled them back to sleep.

In that moment, they were in sync. Without words, they seemed to understand each other. Their energies felt perfectly matched, they mimicked each other and held each other in a comfortable stasis. In that moment, they forgot about their traumas, their heartaches, the complications of their shared histories. In that moment, it felt so easy to love, to be loved. In that moment, they were young again. Just two girls, sharing a bed, sharing a dream, sharing a future in each other’s arms.


End file.
